Golf Page 119 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Paul Azinger Demands The Protection Of Shrubbery
Because it's been far too long since we checked in with the "official blog of GCSAA's Golf Course Management magazine," let's do so now. They decided to follow Fred Klauk, the head superintendent at Sawgrass, around for the day....

How Not To Ride In A Golf Cart
It's a beautiful day in New York City today, and though we don't golf, it does seem like a lovely afternoon to be on a golf course. Particularly for a ride in golf cart. Drunk. What could possibly go wrong?...

People Losing Their Life's Savings ... Live On NBC!
It's a logical idea whose time has obviously come: Televised golf wagering. In a move that could only be made by a network desperate after missing out on the Barbaro documentary, NBC is going to televise a full golf tournament made entirely of degenerate gamblers. And Fox is doing it too....

Ripping It And Gripping It With John Daly
A boardroom somewhere in corporate America: "Gentlemen, who better to sell our golf balls than John Daly? And to add color, let's show him brandishing a beer and driving haphazardly in a golf cart!" (Murmurs of agreement). Corporate president: "We'd be idiots NOT to try it!"...

A Brief History Of Sportswriter Gambling
The ombudsman over at The Washington Post is appalled to learn that Post writers have been gambling on The Masters, saying, "maybe the Masters bets next year should be in Oreos, not cash," which, if you've looked at the people covering The Masters lately, is probably what they're spending their mone...

The Golf Horror Film You've All Been Waiting For
In the grand tradition of The Catcher — three strikes ... you're dead — comes Sports By Brooks' discovery of a film currently hitting the festival circuit seeing funding: Slice. Yep: It's a slasher movie about golf. It also has a decidedly inferior tagline: "It's a game you'll play for the rest of y...

Tiger, Or The No Name?
In almost every sport other than golf, we are conditioned to root for the underdog. When it comes down to the final moments, when two competitors face off for the ultimate prize, we feel compelled to get behind the guy trying to win his first title, rather than watching the old champion get another ...

Jesus Wins The Masters
I'd like to credit Zach Johnson for the win, but he keeps giving all the credit to Jesus. Hey, he won it, he gets to choose where the credit goes....

Phil Mickelson Is Not A Wooden-Shafted Legend
I had no idea that song had words. I liked it better before I discovered that earlier in the week ... and I didn't like it much then. It's nothing personal, but I want to beat that guy to death with a 9-iron....

Golfer Of The Week: Elsie McLean
Short of Tiger Woods winning the green jacket and celebrating by making love to Phil Mickelson's wife on the front porch of Butler Cabin while Jim Nantz describes every detail with awed reverence, we'll not be seeing anything this cool at The Masters today. 102-year-old Elsie McLean made a hole-in-o...

Jim Nantz Is The Master
If you love scrambling for pars and conservative golf (as opposed to all the extreme high-risk golf out there), you should love today's Masters coverage. The course continues to play very tough, with most of today's players being well over par. A few have gotten to red numbers, though, with Tiger Wo...

Tiger Will Even Beat You At Passing Gas
As Tiger Woods begins his march for yet another Masters victory, we look deep into the soul of a champion, try to figure out what makes him who he is, why he is dominant, who he is inside. For some insight, we check out this quote from golf announcer David Feherty, who describes an ongoing contest h...

Hey, The Masters Start Tomorrow
Even though it's dreary outside and we're kind of ill from it — we don't ask much from weather except for it to make up its mind — it is obviously springtime, because The Masters start tomorrow....

CBS Is Taking Augusta By Storm
With the Masters just two days away, it's time to get in the swing of things, and by "swing of things," we mean looking like this....

Sergio Garcia Treats The Cup Like Pacman Jones Treats The Ladies
That's just gross. And I'm sorry, Sergio, the velocity at which the spit propelled from your now disgusting-to-me face does not excuse your filth....

That'll Teach You To Be Nice, Boo
There's no reason to get into a lot of the details, but there's a golfer named Tom Johnson, and yesterday, he had this long shot that he had to play from on the green, off the green, and then back on. He hit the shot, and he hit it well, but he didn't tell his caddy to remove the pin, which is somet...

Why Do They Mic Up Golfers, Anyway?
For all the talk of Tim Hardaway over the last week, we mustn't forget this grand moment from last year's Masters, when Vijay Singh, upset with a slicing drive, croaked "Fucking Faggot Motherfucker!" in his special Vijah Singh accent....

Fuzzy Zoeller Is Not Happy With A Bored Law Firm Worker
You thought Jay Mariotti was the only person overly sensitive to Wikipedia criticism, but apparently golfer Fuzzy Zoeller is even worse about it: He's a law firm with an employee he believes posted defamatory statements about him on the site....

Tiger Woods Hits It Like A Champ
Deviant perversion Romance is in the air today here on Deadspin, as women that I find attractive keep doing things that make them less attractive. First, Hingis goes and gets engaged... and now, Elin Nordegren has gotten herself impregnated. Tiger is presumably the father, but I wouldn't rule out ...

Ain't Nothin' Wrong With A Little Golf, A Little Cunnilingus, Ain't Never Hurt Nobody
Here's a very special Christmas gift for the lesbian golfers in the Deadspin audience, as well as the people in charge of programming at ESPN. From Outsports.com comes the news that a new lesbian golf tour is being launched in 2007. This will be perfect when the Worldwide Leader finally launches E...